What Am I Doing?

Here I am, my typical thoughts everytime I feel empty.

I've been thinking recently, what will I do after this.

I probably will finish my degree, getting a job somewhere, get married to someone, have kids, and die eventually. More or less.

I always want something different, I've been always a rebel. I will always look for other ways.

But not in this. I fucking have no clue.

My friend said to me once: get a life.

That kind of moment always, always make me stop.

What life he was referring to?

Because I think I always do that: get a life.

Do I?

What am I doing?

I'm sitting here in sekre hmtpwk, upstairs, trying to write an essay assignment with Regina Spektor's song is played on my Spotify. 3 friends of mine, Kintan, Sandy and Puti are exactly in my sight doing the same thing (I'm assuming).

Yup. That's probably the problem.

I'm seeing 'what I'm doing' as something really, really narrow.